"Girls throw their feet at you and declare their undying love." -Liz to Mike
"You can't build a life for yourself in Phoenix...." -Terry
"Love doesn't wear a watch." -Rex Morgan, M.D.
"Can you imagine what it'd be like if there were no light? It'd be [long pause] dark." -Reggie Coates
"Man, if only I were female, I wouldn't have to be consistent" -Todd
"Man sucks." -Liz
"Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha!" -Sarah
"Sarah, stop laughing." -Liz
"Did you notice...oh, no, you wouldn't; you're grad students." -Ben
"I don't understand why teenagers get drunk; they should just stay up all night." -Gretchen, 40 hours sleepless and counting
"Oh, I love when Calvin runs around naked..." -Gretchen, "normal" sleep
"I have an urge to:
"You can stuff it." -Justine after presenting a gift of zucchini to Todd and Mike
"Never put a woman above your car." -Dale
"I can remember who I was with, but I can't remember what I saw." -Paula's only trip to Flicks
"I have to stop sleeping with women." -Eric Weiss
"Pay attention, Liz. This is what it's like to be a guy." Todd, re. Liz and Paula's 'You choose...I don't want to go there' dialog
"What would you guess would be Dan and my favorite thing to do in our free time? C'mon, fill in the blank...wait, no..." -Rev. Dr. Elizabeth Vincent
"Mike is such a scammer...he's the Dave Dettoni of 20's" -Beth Blackwell
"No, Wallace, I'm stupid." -Ben
"There were a lot of sights to see, and most of them moved." -Dale, upon his return from Sweden
"Who would drive all the way from Davis to date you?" -Tamara to Dale
"Praying grandmothers are dangerous." -Lambert Dolphin
"That-- and it was liberally peppered with sex!" -The Bad and the Beautiful
"I got a doojigger!" -Rebecca M's Grandmother
"It must of come from somebodies mouth..." -Rebecca M, re. debris inside Son of Slacker
"Men don't tell women what to do, women do what they want." -Cary Grant to Ingrid Bergman in Hitchcock's "Notorious"
"Sarah, you have to keep your hands off men's underwear." -Dale
"Dale wants to see beautiful girls." -Wallace, 'forgetting' to capitalize the movie title on cornerstone-chatter
"I feel like a giant walking condom..." -Todd, wearing his 99¢ emergency poncho
"There were too many people for the amount of sauce." -Dale (if confused just ask him)
"Hmmm. There are no guarantees with contraception..." -Todd
"It's just for the actual release that you need the control." -Brad (yes, BRAD!)
"They all seem young and sissy to me." -Brad on Girl Scouts
"Did anyone take a picture while I was taking it off?" -Liz
"When I drink, I don't drink alone." -Dale Perrigo
"You're completely lacking in class." -Liz to Dale
"I have a very large butt." -Eric Weiss
"I had to ask that question because it was so inappropriate." -Todd Neller
"I'm Frito-Lay." -Sarah (ask her, she'll tell you)
"It'll be my biggest vowel movement yet" -Brad in a game of Scrabble